Thank you for taking the time to choose this book. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed the experience of putting it together.  The book was a labor of love and even though it started off very fast, it took much longer then expected to finish. But I believe all good things come in their own time, so even with all of life’s adventures seeming to get in the way, I knew it would all come together at the right place and time.

Now for the big question, what drew you to this book? Are you looking for something? If you chose it in the hope of finding some answers then you’re in the right place. For every book or place that you look always has a golden nugget of wisdom hidden somewhere inside. The trick is to have an open mind so you can find them when they present themselves. With that in mind I’m going to tell you what you won’t find in this book. If you’re looking for some kind of how-to book about how to set up your own dungeon or how to use some easy come-on lines to score a date then you may want to keep looking.  This book explains the deep core issues of male bonding in the BD/SM fetish setting.

So why did I write this book?  I wrote it for a number of reasons, some were personal and others spiritual but mostly I wrote it for you. To offer you a new view on where our culture is heading and to offer a map to help navigate through treacherous waters as safely as possible. In these pages you’ll find truths that will free you in ways you won’t expect.  I presented the information in a simple format and added some stories to make the reading more interesting. My goal is for you to be better able to fully enjoy your sexuality and understand how close the bonds run between two people when respect, trust and understanding are present.

As for me I’m always looking for answers.  I’m always changing and always growing. I believe that you never stop evolving. There’s always something new to learn or experience. Life just works that way. You can fight it or be an element of change.  The choice is yours.

A special thanks to my leather family, the support of the local and international gay BD/SM - fetish community, my friends, the persons responsible for getting this book to you but most of all, to the young men I had the honor of calling my boys. Lastly as a tribute to the mentors and guides that made me the man I am today.  I will always love them and never forget them.   


To the Circle of Fire;
those who have gone before,
those who are present,
and those who have yet to come.
*Don Miguel Ruiz – The Four Agreements